Things I’d like to tell my younger self….

At each Four Spaces event, we invite participants to share their own One Minute History – either about them, or something they feel passionate about.  We decided these would make great blogs. This OMH is from Vic.


I am blessed to work with loads of really capable, talented and amazing women – most of them younger than I am.  One lunchtime a few weeks ago I sat listening to them chat over lunch, I was struck by how much of their conversation featured self-doubt and self-criticism.  It made me think back and reflect on my self-image over the years and think about how easy it has been to put myself down.  Listening to these amazing women made me think about how important it is that we tell ourselves the positives, so whilst this is rather retrospective so here is a note to my younger selves….

Dear 12 year old me – not wearing “the right” clothes might feel huge today but it won’t hold you back.  You’ll find your look and like it.

Dear 16 year old me – being cool and going out dancing at the weekend isn’t everything about being 16, when you’re dancing to Kylie at Melt! In your late 30’s you’ll realise that’s probably much cooler than the 16 year old disco you missed out on.

Dear 18 year old Vickey – Your A Level results won’t define you for the rest of your life, truth is they probably only matter for today and that will be it.

Dear 21 year old Vic – Keep speaking up and speaking out; be proud of who you are and where you have come from.  Being quiet won’t make you more middle class.

Dear 25 year old Vic – You’re pretty good at this work thing.  It’s going to be another 10 years before someone looks you in the eye and says this, but know you’re capable, determined, talented and bright – keep going it will all pay off.

To 30 year old me – not being married by now isn’t a sign that you’re one of life’s failures, no matter what your mum might say.

To my 34 year old self – that brave and bold decision that you made to say goodbye and walk away from everything that was familiar won’t break you – it really will make you.  Not long from now you will look back and realise it was the best thing you could have possibly have done.  It worked out just right.

To my present self, my future self and to every capable, talented and amazing women out there be kind to yourself, find moments to be good to yourself and be positive about the brilliant and fabulous woman that you are.

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